The great masker of feelings
by Mightybooshrocks
Summary: John knows Sherlock. He knows he got upset by what Sebastian said in the bank. He tries to comfort him and turns out feelings are revealed and Sherlock isn't as strong as he appears.


Sherlock Holmes was good at masking his feelings. Very good in fact; just not from me. It wasn't hard to see the hurt shoot across his face, even for a second when Sebastian had said they'd all hated him at uni. I wanted to punch him in the face as soon as the words left his mouth but I decided that probably wouldn't be the wisest decision, so I refrained and bit my lip to silence the growl of '_you bastard' _that wanted to rip from inside me. We got up to leave the office but I could still see Sherlock wasn't right, it annoyed me to an extent; he didn't need to hide his feelings all the time. His eyes looked so sad, so hopeful, like he was still wishing he wasn't void of all social skills; it made me want to cry. I saw a disabled toilet to my left and suddenly, on a wave of impulse grabbed Sherlock by the arm and ushered him into the toilet, locking the door behind me and turning to face the rare expression of surprise plastered across Sherlock's face.

"John, what are you doing?" whispered Sherlock.

"Sorry I…Sorry" I said looking down at the floor not really knowing what to do from here. I felt Sherlock's hand gently graze against my shoulder and down my arm.

"John, what's wrong?"

"I…I couldn't stand Sebastian saying all those things and…"

"John he's just stupid it doesn't bother…"

"Yes it does! It does bother you, I can see it!" I growled pulling away from him, which was difficult as the disabled toilet was tiny and had us pushed quite close together.

"John just calm…"

"Don't tell me to calm down, you're amazing and spectacular and…" my speech was cut off as I felt Sherlock's lips softly press against mine in a feather like state. His lips lingered on mine for god knows how long before he finally pulled away to straighten his jacket and to stare anywhere that wasn't me.

"Don't do that" I whispered sternly "Don't pretend like that didn't happen"

"John don't be stupid, of course it happened!"

"Well then don't pretend like it didn't!" Our heavy panting was all that could be heard as we cooled down a bit from the combine adrenaline of kissing and fighting at the same time.

"John, I'm sorry"

"Sherlock Holmes…apologizing?" I mocked as I smiled up at him.

"Okay it does bother me John, I don't want everyone to hate me they just do" sighed Sherlock as he sat himself on the grey granite of the basin with his legs dangling just off the floor.

"But everyone doesn't hate you!" I exclaimed.

"Maybe not everyone, but no one loves me" he said fiddling with the taps, turning them off and on again and watching the water gush out to distract himself "Mycroft protects me because it's better for his own interests, the less you know about my parents the better, and I barely have friends in Lestrade or Molly due to how much I insult them! You see no one"

"I love you" I blurted out already covering my mouth with my hands before all the words had left it. I sighed looking down, realising that I did love Sherlock and that even though that wasn't how I wanted to tell him, it was done and there was no going back. I sighed again looking back up to Sherlock as I walked over to him so I was stood right in front and we were locking eyes as the height difference had been evened out very nicely by his choice to sit down.

"I love you" I repeated more firmly this time cupping his face in my hands.

"No you don't John, you love the _idea_ of me" he whispered.

"No, I'm pretty sure I love you"

"But how could you? I'm pompous, arrogant, self centred, selfish…"

"Whilst you are all those things and more" I laughed "Your amazing, gorgeous, basically a sex god actually, clever, funny, witty and just you Sherlock"

"You're complimenting me?"

"Of course I am! Don't tell me you've never been complimented before?" I laughed. But the sound of my laughter died down quickly as I realised that Sherlock was being deadly serious.

"What, never?" I exclaimed again.

"Well not by anyone that isn't you"

"What about your parents?"

"Like I said the least known about them the better"

"Sherlock, there your parents!"

"John listen to me, they weren't interested, they called me freak to, maybe not to my face, oh but they called me it"

"Sherlock…I…" I wanted to cry, to literally cry for this fragile man that seemed so strong. I leant forward and slowly kissed him, he kissed back very softly but I couldn't figure out why he was so soft in his actions, in my mind there were two reasons.

He was still unsure about how I felt (Unlikely considering I declared my love for him)

Or that he was so upset that it had really taken it out of him (This seemed more likely)

I felt a tear against my face and as I pulled away I saw that it was in fact Sherlock's tear. I wiped it away softly with my thumb and just leant back in to kiss him again not needing words to try and comfort him. He kissed me back a bit more this time and I pulled him closer by grabbing his thighs and pulling him to me so we were flushed together. I felt his arms wrap around my neck as he enclosed my head in his gangly limbs and his legs hooked lightly behind my own legs as he also pulled me closer to him. Our kisses were getting a bit more passionate and the pressure was definitely increasing. I felt Sherlock's hands travel downwards as he came to softly rest his hands on my lower back; I pulled away from his lips but lunged for his neck not wanting to be without lip to skin contact for any longer than necessary.

"John…" I heard Sherlock moan as his head hit the glass as he tipped his head back in pure ecstasy. I'd already pulled his scarf away but it still wasn't enough, I slid his coat from his shoulders and then proceeded in undoing his shirt buttons; this sadly resulted in me having to pull away to be able to concentrate on those damn buttons.

"John…please…" I heard Sherlock moan again. With him moaning my name so sweetly it was near impossible for me to undo the whole shirt and I made my way back up capturing his lips in yet another kiss. I felt him tug my coat off and proceed to undo my shirt as well; it didn't surprise me that with his mind he could accomplish this without ever needing to pull away from our kiss. As we pushed ourselves together again I could feel his prominent bulge press against mine.

"Sherlock" I groaned hiding my head in his shoulder. We started pushing against each other slowly as each movement was languid and filled with emotion. He gave as I took and I gave as he took, perfect harmony as we grinded against each other as our pleasure increased and our movements became more savage and needing.

"John, please I'm going to…"

"Let go" I whispered before I head the bang of his head against the glass of the mirror again and his loud groan as he came. I wasn't far behind and within seconds I had bitten on to his neck to muffle my moan and I was coming to. Our heaving breaths filled the room as we tried to regain our normal breathing patterns.

"Please believe me that I love you Sherlock" I pleaded as I rested my forehead upon his and looked into his eyes.

"I…I believe you John, I just still don't understand why?"

"Well let me tell you why but at home, I don't want to tell you in the same building as that bastard Sebastian"

"Fair enough" chuckled Sherlock as he kissed me once more and pushed me away so he could stand; he didn't look to stable on his feet but he did his best to conceal this from me, very humorous on my behalf that I literally made Sherlock Holmes's legs buckle.

"Don't you dare think no one loves you" I said sternly as I grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the disabled toilet and down the bank escalators. I saw Sebastian out of the corner of my eye but didn't do anything; I'd confront him later.

**Hope you liked it. Please review and constructive criticism helps me write better so all is welcome Xx**


End file.
